Something's Gotta Give

As if all the STUFF going on in the world weren't enough.

The coronavirus is starting to surge again, and things like toilet paper, paper towels, and cleaning supplies are becoming scarce, and my foraging trips are getting longer and longer.  Protests over social justice have been ongoing for over two months now and the social media are uglier and uglier.  The church denomination I belong to is getting ready to split, and I'm not sure what I'm going to do about that.  The economy is unsettled.  There is so much uncertainty in all facets of life that we're all kind of walking on the edge.

So I've had a frustrating week.  After days of rain, the weather has finally cleared up, but then That Man and I had a "discussion" about the financials of removing the buckeye tree that snapped off.  And the next day, his cell phone bit the dust - the battery wouldn't hold a charge more than a couple of hours on standby, and it's a phone with a battery that couldn't be replaced, of course.  He's been back at work for nearly three weeks, and working third shift, he sleeps during the day so I was left with the fabulous job of securing a new phone.  When That Girl was here at the beginning of July, we drove to the Verizon store where she stood in line outside and waited her turn to buy a new phone.  It took some time, but she got it done. 

Well, things have changed since then!

You can't just show up and buy a phone anymore.  I had to go online, figure out what phones were acceptable, then figure out what phones were actually available nearby (he wanted it ASAP), then order one and pick it up curbside.

Easy, right?

Well, it SHOULD have been, but...!  When I'd click on a specific phone, a different one would come up.  When I finally got a phone and a case into the online shopping cart and agreed to this that and the other, I clicked on "Proceed to Secure Checkout," and wound up on the same page.  I checked and checked, but I hadn't missed filling in any fields or checking any boxes.  So how come I couldn't Proceed to the Secure Checkout? 

I started working on this project at 9:00 in the morning.  By noon, I hadn't been able to even get a phone into the cart!  I was working on a laptop, and I was to the point of pounding the keyboard with my fist (NOT my typical solution to computer troubles) and almost throwing it across the room and against the wall.  I was so frustrated and angry I couldn't stop tears from coming.

Finally, I gave up and called Verizon.  The nice lady on the phone said three-quarters of the calls she'd gotten that day were about trouble with the website.  She placed my order and we crossed our fingers - it went through!

The hard part was over!  HA.

 In about an hour, the email arrived - come get the phone.  I drove to the store, got the phone, drove home, and started activating the beast.  During the activation, you can copy your setting and apps just by having the old phone and the new phone next to each other.  Things were going according to plan, but then the new phone tried to pull the settings and apps from MY phone!  GREAT.  More frustration and tears until I figured out how to back out of the activation mode and start over. 

When it was all over, it was 5:00, and I was mentally and emotionally exhausted.  The next day, I felt like I had a hangover!  I was completely worthless.

So why did it affect me so strongly? 

Well, like I said at the beginning of this post, we're all walking on the edge. The stress that's become the white-noise background of our lives and keeps us on the edge.  I'd found a precarious balance on the tightrope, and the phone fiasco was just enough to push me over that edge. 

Oh, it was definitely annoying and way too time consuming, but was it something to cry over?  No, but when you're overwhelmed,something's gotta give, and it did.

I'VE LOST IT!

The Culprit

I had one of THOSE days. An annoying, frustrating, panicky day.

An "I think I'm losing my mind" day.

I was going out to run errands, so I gathered up all the necessary STUFF I haul along - a coat, the
phone, the list, the wallet...

THE WALLET.

WHERE IS THE WALLET?

Is there a worse feeling than not being able to locate one of the two items that literally hold all your life - the phone or the WALLET?

Where is it?

It's not in the car. It's not on the washer. It's not on the kitchen table. It's not on the kitchen counter. It's not in my purse. It's not on the end table. It's not on the nightstand. It's not on the bed. It's not on the cedar chest. It's not on the dresser. It's not by the bathroom sink (a desperate try, that one).

Where-is-it-where-is-it-where-is-it-where-is-it?

I had it last night. I paid. I put it back in my bag. But then what? Did I have it in the car? In the house? In the laundry room? In the kitchen? In the living room? In the bedroom?

I DON'T REMEMBER.

Whereisitwhereisitwhereisitwhereisit?

I moved everything in the car. I looked on all the seats. I looked under all the seats. I looked in the console. I looked back by the liftgate. Three times.

Whereisitwhereisitwhereisitwhereisit?

I searched the kitchen counter and table. Four times.

Whereisitwhereisitwhereisitwhereisit?

I went through my purse and assorted project tote bags in the bedroom (maybe I threw it in the wrong one accidentally). Five times.

Whereisitwhereisitwhereisitwhereisit?

I went through the car again - this time with a flashlight.

Whereisitwhereisitwhereisitwhereisit?

Panic reigned supreme. I was running in circles, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Whereisitwhereisitwhereisitwhereisit?

It made no sense. WHERE DID I PUT IT? It HAS to be here!

Whereisitwhereisitwhereisitwhereisit?

I don't want to replace my credit and debit cards, library cards, driver's license, my other licenses, gift cards, and all that.

Whereisitwhereisitwhereisitwhereisit?

ONE LAST TRY.

I went into the bedroom and looked in a basket on the cedar chest. Not there. I moved a piece of cardboard and...

THERE IT IS!

Hours and hours of worry, turmoil, pounding heart, and utter panic, and there it sat, almost in plain sight.

Good grief.

I'm exhausted.

I'm too old for this.